Self Confidence

The 3 Secrets to Issues with Self Confidence Part 4

The 3  Secrets to Issues with Self Confidence  

Part 4

sad mature woman

Secret 2 to working with our issues with self confidence is affirmations.

Affirmations help us consciously choose words that will either help eliminate something from our life or attract a desired outcome. We have self talk going on all the time, these talks are affirmations too.   Every thought we think and every word we speak is an affirmation. All of our self-talk and internal dialogue is a stream of affirmations. We’re using affirmations every moment whether we realize it or not. When using positive affirmations we are making a conscious decision of what information we want to feed our sub conscious mind in order to achieve our desired outcome. Using positive affirmations will increase our self confidence, consequently transform your lives and  make our dreams come true.

It therefore helps to have a list of affirmations available and to read them at least once per day in the morning ,  but even better  is in the morning and evening. The secret to affirmations is to FEEL them while you read them.  Merely reading them in order to get the chore done will not be very helpful.

For example:

  • I am confident
  • I am strong and powerful
  • I always go after what I want in life
  • I am confident in social situations
  • I believe in myself
  • I meet challenges confidently
  • I always express my thoughts and opinions with great confidence
  • I love and accept myself deeply
Secret 3   –    Life Style changes

Have an honest look at your life: which habits are positive, which are negative?  Which habits are you willing to give up or what changes do you want to implement to introduce a healthier life style? This could be better diet, giving up addictions like coffee, cigarettes or alcohol. Making sure you are getting enough sleep. Consider adopting relaxation techniques and/or exercise.

Do not try and do everything at once, one step at the time and all steps need to be bite size and achievable.

Understand that these changes will take time and patience – make a commitment to yourself,  you are worth it.

The goal is to slowly introduce a lifestyle that is supportive and healthy on all levels, emotionally, physically and mentally!  All these steps are steps of being kind and loving to yourself. Treating yourself in a respectful and caring manner, giving yourself the love and attention you desire and deserve, with that creating the feeling you are worthy and deserving of being treated loving and respectfully,   which creates self confidence and release of the issues around confidence!

  •  Ensure you have a healthy diet, including lots of greens and fruit. Consider taking a quality vitamin supplement. You will be surprised how much a quality supplement can improve your physical and emotional well being and with that positively affect your self confidence.
  • Surround yourself with positive people, avoid negative and critical people. Positive and enthusiastic people can have a wonderful influence on your self confidence.
  • Make room for fun activities. Remember laughter is the best medicine! The more fun activities you include in your life the more positive you will become, the more you will increase your self confidence – I promise!
  •  Are you getting enough physical exercise? Improved self-esteem or self confidence is a key psychological benefit of regular physical activity. When you exercise, your body releases a chemical called endorphin. This endorphin interact with the receptors in your brain that reduce your perception of pain and trigger a positive feeling in the body.
  • Do you meditate? Attend yoga classes? What do you do for your relaxation?  Relaxation is important in life as it helps to release stress. When you are stressed you are more prone to be negative and critical. Get my 5 Instant Relaxation Techniques here.
  •  Do you get enough sleep? A good night’s sleep will help you to feel better in yourself and be more positive about yourself, it helps to make better decisions and be alert to what’s going on around you and be more productive. Consequently this will help to increase your self confidence.

These are the 3 Secrets to dealing with issues around confidence.  Improving your self confidence is not a skill you can just learn, it is a process of releasing negative experiences to adopt a positive mindset, lifestyle changes and affirmations, thus achieving a well being on all levels, mental, physical and emotional.

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The 3 Secrets To Issues with Self Confidence Part 3

The 3  Secrets To Issues with Self Confidence  

Part 3


sad mature woman


There are 3 secrets to our issues with self confidence or lack of self confidence are:
  1. Releasing past traumas
  2. Working with affirmations
  3. Life style changes

 Secret 1:    Releasing the traumas from your past to release issues around self confidence

If you truly want to move forward and have a great life, you need to go through this process of working through your issues with self confidence. I am not saying this is a hard process, not at all; it can be lots of fun. I love this process as I believe better out than in! I see it in my clients over and over again. Their self confidence goes up as they release all the traumas and emotional issues. With the increased self confidence they trust in themselves, they believe in themselves! With that there is a new joy for life, an enthusiasm and they go for their dreams, they have goals and achieve them. And they know they can achieve them! Is that worth the trouble of going through the work of releasing the traumas? YES, absolutely!

This release of issues with self confidence can be done with EFT (Emotional freedom Tapping), Hypnosis,  Neuro Linguistic Programming and energy healing. I am sure there are more modalities out there, but these are the ones I know of as being suitable for working with our  issues with self confidence.

I personally use EFT. It has proven itself to me again and again. It is easy to learn and easy to use. I use it in all my sessions and in my personal life. Therefore, I will talk about EFT.

For me, EFT is the perfect tool for releasing any traumas, negative and limiting beliefs, self doubts, self criticism, emotional difficulties, issues with self confidence and so on. I will give you a little introduction to EFT, but I do recommend working with an experienced practitioner when working with your past traumas. You can book private coaching with me here.

EFT is a gentle tapping with two fingers on acupuncture points around the eye and under the collarbone.

Words you say while tapping:

Inner eyebrow:   I am ready to release and let go.

Outer eyebrow:  I am okay to let it go

Under eye:          It is safe to let it go


 When tapping under the collarbone, you tell your story, you talk about all your emotions, your stresses and your issues, your traumas, your issues around self confidence, your deeper inner feelings. This is the place to talk about your traumas while you tap. This process will facilitate the release of the emotional charge that is attached to the trauma, as well as the belief systems of I am not good enough and I don’t deserve. Once the emotional charge has been released you are free of that trauma. And this is the goal of the release. With time you work yourself through as many traumas as possible to achieve a feeling of inner peace. This inner peace is a feeling of being positive about yourself and the world. This feeling is a feeling of love for yourself and a feeling of  self confidence.

As I have said before, please ensure you get the support of an experienced practitioner when working through your traumas, especially if you are new to this work.

To be continued…

If you enjoyed this article and you would like support in dealing with your self confidence issues, please click the Book Now Button below.



 Please get my FREE 5 Instant Relaxation Techniques here. Website-pop-up